A Product of Me

Last night,I was sharing with a friend a quote from the movie The Departed. In the beginning of the movie,Jack Nicholson’s character says,“I don’t want to be a product of my environment,I want my environment to be a product of me.”

Tuesday night was the most difficult night of my short political career. I was visibly shaken by the experience. It was my first time voting against someone and not something. A person. A man. Someone I genuinely care about. He’s funny,really funny. A great storyteller and he truly loves Grass Valley in his own,very personal way. I voted against a friend.

We have two very distinct styles. He thinks I don’t know what I want and I think he’s not willing to do what it takes to get what he wants. We’re just different…and that’s good…it’s actually great. It’s great for someone like me to see it at this time in my career. I am going to remember the sting and it’s creating something within me that is going to make me better,stronger. Someday,I will be “more experienced” and there will be someone “less experienced” maneuvering for the same piece of turf and I will have this to fall back on…and I will have the opportunity to be unlike those who have served with and before me. I want to be someone of impeccable character,filled with integrity,my motivations to be selfless,and moved for the overall betterment of my community. I want to be fearless,regardless of the change of landscape ahead. I will not be engulfed by the fear of those who are not willing to take a chance,are not willing to let go of the reins,are not willing to make a mistake and in turn destroy the opportunity for something new,fresh,and different.

There is a lot of work to be done. I am not stopping,not even going to slow down enough for this to make a difference. The decision was not meant to be hurtful and by saying “no” I afforded myself an opportunity to be who I am and vote for a set of ideals I value…a set of ideals I was elected to represent. In my small way,I made the environment become a product of me.

Deciding What Type of Shoes We Should Wear

It’s 2:30 in the morning…I can’t sleep. Yesterday,the Grass Valley City Council held another Economic Development Workshop. I put the word “another” in bold italics because I want to emphasize that it’s the second one. Obvious right? Obviously not based on the conclusion of the meeting last night. The online version of The Union has quoted me ‘“It’s been three and a half hours and we’ve had another kumbaya session,” said Councilwoman Yolanda Cookson. “I want goals and I want to set deadlines. I need to be able to say we did this,this,this and this.”’ The meeting began at 3:00PM and by 6:30PM we had not even touched Attachment A (the entire document can be found here)…the portion of the document where actual strategies and actions plans are put in play. I shared with everyone how frustrating it was to be in basically the same place we were at the early part of the 2010. Thankfully,one of my fellow councilmember was able to shed some light on my frustration in private. They shared with me that I was frustrated because I did not know what I wanted. Aha! That’s it! Thank you so very much for identifying the root of my frustration…seriously! Give me a break! I am frustrated because after an accumulated seven hours of meeting over a course of an eighth month time span we are still at the Start Line of the race deciding what type of shoes we should wear.

Back in September,I asked for the issue of Economic Development to be revisited because I believed there were so much that we as a local government could be doing to facilitate development. Over the course of next five days I am going to go though the five strategies and action plans provided by Staff and how I would like them to be acted upon.

There is no wrong or right answer…it comes down to what we value and what we want as a community.