Last night,I was sharing with a friend a quote from the movie The Departed. In the beginning of the movie,Jack Nicholson’s character says,“I don’t want to be a product of my environment,I want my environment to be a product of me.”

Tuesday night was the most difficult night of my short political career. I was visibly shaken by the experience. It was my first time voting against someone and not something. A person. A man. Someone I genuinely care about. He’s funny,really funny. A great storyteller and he truly loves Grass Valley in his own,very personal way. I voted against a friend.

We have two very distinct styles. He thinks I don’t know what I want and I think he’s not willing to do what it takes to get what he wants. We’re just different…and that’s good…it’s actually great. It’s great for someone like me to see it at this time in my career. I am going to remember the sting and it’s creating something within me that is going to make me better,stronger. Someday,I will be “more experienced” and there will be someone “less experienced” maneuvering for the same piece of turf and I will have this to fall back on…and I will have the opportunity to be unlike those who have served with and before me. I want to be someone of impeccable character,filled with integrity,my motivations to be selfless,and moved for the overall betterment of my community. I want to be fearless,regardless of the change of landscape ahead. I will not be engulfed by the fear of those who are not willing to take a chance,are not willing to let go of the reins,are not willing to make a mistake and in turn destroy the opportunity for something new,fresh,and different.

There is a lot of work to be done. I am not stopping,not even going to slow down enough for this to make a difference. The decision was not meant to be hurtful and by saying “no” I afforded myself an opportunity to be who I am and vote for a set of ideals I value…a set of ideals I was elected to represent. In my small way,I made the environment become a product of me.